Sunday, October 25, 2009

How to Spot a Passive Aggressive Husband

The passive aggressive husband can sometimes be tricky to spot out. He’s caring, happy, and easy going on the outside. At work he’s always willing to give a helping hand. So why is it that when he’s at home he can’t seem to keep his commitments?

He’s negative, procrastinates, and conveniently forgets to do most things asked of him. Does he have a split personality? Doesn’t he care?

The passive aggressive husband’s spouse usually feels despair over her husband’s inabilty to cooperate with her. She feels frustrated with his negative attitude and endless excuses. If you have suspicions that your husband may be passive aggressive, ask yourself these questions:

When you ask him to do something, does he constantly forget to do it?
Is he usually negative towards you, and unreasonable critical?
Does he sabotage you by not being supportive in your goals?
Does he take verbal jabs at you, under the guise that he is joking, or being sarcastic?
Does he speak negatively about you to others, while maintaining the act the he is a perfect husband?

If any of those actions ring a bell, it sounds like your husband is passive aggressive. Basically, when your husband is angry, he takes his anger out on you in an indirect way, so you don’t even know that he’s doing it.

It is a devastating cycle that can end marraiges. Your husband builds up anger and resentment, and secretly takes his hostility out on you. He does it in such a subtle way that outwardly, he appears to be a normal, caring guy.

It is by all means frustrating and confusing. You could be minding your own business and your husband could make a sarcastic remark about your weight. Or you could ask him for help washing dishes, but he’ll do such a bad job that you end up doing it all yourself.

With a little attention and trusting on what you observe, not what you wish him to be or do, is possible to answer the question about his behavior: is it a legitimate task forgotten or is it a habit that repeats and leaves the other person frustrated and angry? Here is your response, and now you know.

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